Indeed the guy is not into me if I will base my judgment on the rules set by the popular piece of read called, “He’s Just Not into You”. However, if I will refer to my stock knowledge of your personality, I can’t help but admit that I am getting caught into the web. Bias due to attraction plus the oddity of your actions juxtaposed with your very arrogant and dismissive personality, I can find no other conclusion. You are into me, yet somehow you won’t admit it.
As this will start a formal debate in my head as well as to my readers I will lay down two sides as provision of objectivity. Apologies in advance if balance will still be vague despite the efforts. I am only human.
1. You find me
In this context, finding would mean looking for me whenever I am out of town or we have not been communicating for a year or two. This would mean as well, you seeking and surprisingly still knowing my number despite the number of years that have passed, the fact that I have not been communicating with you through those same digits, and you changing your mobile number along with your phone. Unless you keep people’s contacts written on a phonebook or on a scratch paper posted on your wall, I can only surmise that you have an excellent memory, which as far as I know is something you don’t have.
Given this action which totally contradicts your personality, as you are too lazy to even remember the time we will meet for our “short trip to the mall” as you termed it, I can only conclude that you keep my number somehow.
However, I may just be assuming as there is a possibility that you have asked for my number from our common friends when you desired to communicate with me again after a long time. There is the possibility that you have even gotten it from my cousin, who lives in the subdivision close to where yours is. I may just be deluding myself.
While this is a possibility, I have gone as far as to ask the common friends, as well as my cousin, and they told me that they never gave you my number, nor did you ask for it. Therefore, my conclusion is valid and my argument is flawless.
2. You base your attendance on my attendance
This may be a bit vague, but I find that whenever our group, the so-called tropa, is about to go out and drink you always ask whether I am coming or not. More than three times did it happen that whenever it is neither me nor you who invites the group for a drink, that question is the very first one you ask the group member who invited. This in turn makes me question why I have to be there. First of all, you love liquor and you go anywhere for it (well, most of the time). Second, I presume it won’t matter especially if the person who invited was a guy. And third, our friendship with each other is something, I supposed, to be of equal degree as your friendship with the person who invited. Therefore, you can actually attend the celebration even without me, unless of course, if it is me you want to see and not the party nor the drinks. This is the only logical explanation I can provide.
Now this may just be misleading and the fact is that you enjoy my company more than you enjoy theirs, or you just like the idea of having girls around for you to boast your guitar skills and your humor. This does not point to you having feelings for me. It points that you are one conceited dude and I am a very good friend who can stand you.
As it happened many times, however, there are other girls in most of the celebration. You can display your guitar prowess to them and make them laugh as much as you make me laugh, yet you have to know. You need to be informed if “I” will be there, what time “I” will be arriving, if I am not yet there, and what time “I” will be leaving, if you will be coming late. If the answers to these are “no” and “I am not sure”, you never appear.
This action of basing your decision on mine connotes my significance in your life, at some point. It also foretells of my influence, which I believe is too strong if I am a mere friend in your eyes. This only strengthens the argument that we are actually gravitating towards each other.
3. You feel guilty when you did me wrong
You are too arrogant to say sorry. Even a thank you is very difficult to squeeze out of you, but once you did me wrong you are quick to say sorry and explain why you did what you did. At some point you even try to make up for your mistake. Acting out of character, especially this way, is not making me feel that I am just one of those women you know.
I recognize that this may just be because you do not wish to trample our friendship with your tremendous pride. You say you are sorry because you do not wish me to hate you and completely turn my back on our friendship. Moreover, I may just be blinkered by emotions when it comes to your actions and the words that come with them.
This may be true, but the fact is that you do not say sorry when you do our other friends wrong. When you fail to fulfill your promise to them, you simply shrug it off like nothing happened. With this, I can say that every sorry escaping your lips to me, stems from your anxiety of me hating you; and this anxiety’s rooted to a deep emotion you have for me, an emotion you cannot pinpoint just yet.
In reference to the guidelines set by society-deemed-as-speaking-facts book, I have nothing against the claim that I am but a delusional, over-assuming, and somehow over-confident admirer of yours. As a friend who knew you for quite a long time and unfortunately quote-unquote fell for you, however, I beg to disagree. Your actions, I just don’t know if you are aware of it, actually sends signals that may only be interpreted as the opposite of you not being into me. Therefore if the popular book is right, and you are just leading me on, pray you stop sending mixed signals as you are confusing my mind, making my heart suffer, and provoking me to revoke my lengthy friendship with you. On the other hand, if I am right, do try summing up all the courage to break past the “dude” barrier. I shall be awaiting you with open arms on the other side.
With this, I rest my case.
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